do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Randomize
