I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
