She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
pop tarts are not kleenex
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize