Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
