Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
