I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Mom said you looked used
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
