Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
