Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
