new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
