he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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