3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize