I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
