So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
