we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
