Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
