By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
