just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
