I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I love you. Go after that dick
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
