There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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