Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize