It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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