You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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