wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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