Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
