Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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