i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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