I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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