A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
did i walk over a car last night?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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