I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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