i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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