I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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