man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
