Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
