Rock
Scissors
Fuck
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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