Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
