the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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