let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
