Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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