Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
