So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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