Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
