After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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