matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
