garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
