Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Randomize
