she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize