Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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