omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
then he tried to convert me to islam
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize