i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
