he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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